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Khalid Mukhtar

Word, like wind, cuts through you / Withers all but true you

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Poetry

Phone Pains

Khalid Mukhtar · September 29, 2011 · Leave a Comment

When I was just a child, the phone
Would ring to let you know
That somewhere else a someone sat
Awaiting your ‘hello’;
You’d pick up the phone, or leave it alone;
And that’s how far you’d go.

And then there came the softening blow:
The answering machine,
That played (thanks to your greeting from
Attempt number eighteen)
Each message amassed, the first and the last,
And all those in between.

But Murphy’s law had barely seen
The things that we’d bemoan;
We sigh and roll our eyes at each
Reverberating tone;
Our hunger for tools has made us such fools:
Won’t leave ourselves alone.

Becoming Friends

Khalid Mukhtar · September 16, 2011 · Leave a Comment

Day One: I sow my softest smile,
And reap the harvest wilted frown.

Day Two: I flash that smile and see
Just why the fallen must stay down.

Day Three: my customary smile
Begets a mostly vacant stare.

Day Four: the stare is lessened in
The degree of its vacancy.

Day Five: sweet reciprocity,
As I detect the slightest nod.

Day Six: the nod has swelled to bow,
I marvel at this work of God.

Day Seven: I get greeted first,
We trade our names excitedly.

Day Eight: I sow my softest smile,
And reap the harvest ‘bundantly.

Day Nine: we shake our hands to seal
Our warm relationship in style.

Day Ten: my dear friend receives
Me in his arms before he leaves.

And by the bye, know I ain’t I,
I’m usually the other guy.

On Certain Knowledge

Khalid Mukhtar · September 1, 2011 · Leave a Comment

The new anti-depressant pill,
The iron-clad pretexts for war,
That caring education bill,
Those coupons that we line up for,

All make us feel secure until…

You drown your baby in the bath,
You lose your son to smart-bomb wrath,
You ace the test, but get no call,
Our GM diet kills us all.

Our home-grown double-yew-em-dee
Is knowledge without certainty;
And that is no knowledge at all.
Lets read the writing on the wall,

And taste the glory in the shame
Of trying out this simple cure:
As we defend the good we claim,
Could we just mention, “We’re not sure”؟

About Me

Khalid Mukhtar · September 1, 2011 · Leave a Comment


The more I say, the less you hear;
The less I say, the more its clear,
That wishing for to know me more
Is not a fancy you hold dear.

Humbling Fatherhood

Khalid Mukhtar · September 1, 2011 · Leave a Comment

‘Fit weren’t for fatherhood
I’d never’ve understood
That all the hurt my Dad did blurt
Had come from something good
‘Fit weren’t for fatherhood
I’d never’ve understood
That every time he lost his mind
He’d done the best he could
‘Fit weren’t for fatherhood
I’d never’ve understood
That if I can be half the man
As he, then I’d be good.

Furrows In Your Brow

Khalid Mukhtar · September 1, 2011 · Leave a Comment

It ever pleases me to see
The furrows in your brow
That come about with every pout
Begotten by a row;
So let me plot and fabricate
An argument somehow,
That I may sigh, and gaze upon
The furrows in your brow.

Change My Heart

Khalid Mukhtar · June 7, 2011 · Leave a Comment

This du’aa in verse is the original work of Shaykh Zulfiqar Ahmed Naqshbandi.  A beautiful supplication in Urdu that I was privileged to hear him render in nasheed some years ago.

دل بدل دے


I beg you, Lord, to change my heart,
So steeped in every heedlessness,
Enslaved by passions, avarice,
And vice I shudder to confess.

Your Mercy, Lord: transform my heart,
Bring back to life its every part.

I’ve tired of my sinful ways,
So cleanse and mend my withered heart,
That I may hear it sing your praise;
I beg you, Lord, to change my heart.

That I might turn my eye away
From what displeases you, I pray
That every moment of my day
Be for your sake: Lord, change my heart.

My every peace and every joy
For something of that solemn grief
That brings with it the sweet relief
Of Your remembrance; change my heart.

I lay, defeated, at your door;
Why am I so, Lord? Change my heart
That I may be for ever more
Your servant, Lord; transform my heart.

My Lord, I beg you, set me free
By making me your humble slave,
For that is all I wish to be.
Lord, hear my plea, and change my heart.

O Light of heavens, Light of earth,
This darkness from my heart dispel;
Replace its grief with lasting mirth,
That in Your Light it might revel.

My Lord, my inward state, reform,
My disposition, well adorn;
My stray and heedless self abate;
Reform me, Lord, and change my state.

Lord, give me from your fount until
Of love for you, I’ve had my fill.
My inward state, My Lord, reform,
My disposition, well adorn;

Your Mercy, Lord: transform my heart,
Bring back to life its every part.

To the Proud Parents of Sulayman

Khalid Mukhtar · May 18, 2011 · Leave a Comment


For every of his infant cry,
That brings to you a weary sigh:

May your ears be blessed with the music of the angels and the celestial sounds of the divine recitation.

For every moment of arrest:
(It is what Sulaymans do best)

May you roam the grounds of vast, verdant gardens, hand in hand, unrestrained.

For all the suffocating phews,
All brought about by his refuse:

May you smell the varied fragrances of Jannah and ever find yourself in the company of its fragrant dwellers.

For every wakeful night that’s spent,
And each arousal inclement:

May you find restful repose without weariness on the warm grassy banks of babbling waters.

May Sulayman be your greatest reward forever, and ever.

On Cancer, Guns, and Hit ‘n Runs

Khalid Mukhtar · February 5, 2011 · Leave a Comment

The chemo sessions wore him down,
He so despised the sterile smells,
The chatter, beeps, and flimsy gown,
And then those plain disgusting gels.

But no more thoughts of days gone by,
Of chances lost, of things begun,
And multitud’nous reasons why
Some of those things just won’t get done.

No, none of that. He closed his eyes,
And saw with utmost clarity
The very light that clarifies
The meaning of reality.

Deceased, 12-20-88

She wore a smile of gratitude,
And softly blinked to see just how
Her crazy life had been renewed,
Was tumor-free for eight years now.

Her loving husband, bratty child,
A recent job promotion, and
Their town home fashionably styled,
All came together just as planned.

She left her car to cross the street,
When, BANG BANG BANG – no time to dive,
Her body hit the cold concrete,
And sprang the rest of her alive.

Deceased, 8-13-94

Returning from the library,
He tried to navigate his thoughts
From English and Geography
To complicated scatter plots.

He’d battled cancer as a child,
And thought that was his hardest time,
Until that college kid went wild,
And shot him in a tragic crime.

Disease and wounds had left him strong,
And strong he was in times of strife,
But then, that night, something went wrong:
A drunken driver took his life.

Deceased, 11-6-08.

I am amongst you even as
I breathe, and wince, and laugh, and cry;
I’ve been with you from evermore.
Deceased, mm-dd-yy.

Feather

Khalid Mukhtar · December 27, 2010 · Leave a Comment

Head…pain.

I pull into the parking lot,
And want to shake my head so bad,
But find that I cannot.

Head…pain…feather.

My immobility persists
While I attempt to process why
These words arrest me so.

Head…pain…feather…child.

And then I see inside my head
A scene projected by my heart,
A fascinating show:

A baby in my mother’s arms
Is rocking slowly back and forth;
She smiles, she laughs, she imitates
His coos so very well.

And as he rocks and bobs his head,
She’s taken by surprise just when
His forehead strikes her in the chest,
How hard, I cannot tell.

But she does seem to wince at that
With baby still held in her arms,
Laughing, then crying out in pain,
And then, laughing again.

I blink to end my reverie.
Feather still eludes me.

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